they're like chocolate cake, like cigarettes...

...i know they're bad for me but i just can't leave them alone.
as if applicable on my part.i'm not a chocolate lover and i've never even tried smoking although i do think about trying it some time.anyway, my point being?that i've become addicted to dwelling myself into stuff not worthy of my time.i induce all these thoughts and i feel like i don't even get anything from them.well maybe i still am getting something from them it's just that i can't see that right now.
i've lost a lot for the past couple of months.and i have no idea as to how i'm gonna deal with that.maybe i'm the one who's detaching myself from everything.that in reality, i never really lost anything but i know what i used to have and what i have now is far from what i had then.but don't get me wrong i don't want what i had then.i'm not the type who goes on regretting things that i might have done.what's done is done.but all these changes are starting to get on my nerves.i'm not happy just pretending to be.and the worst part is i can't kid myself anymore.but whether i like it or not that's how things are.so onto a new summer for me.hopefully a good one.